Chaos without reinforces chaos within. ADHD Brains are different.
ADHD kids live with chronic chaos–in their brains. Their innner experience is frequently disorganized, unfocused and not particularly goal oriented.
When scientists look at their brain functions, ADHD kids have underactive frontal lobes and generate more of the brain waves associated with disorganized thinking.
They, more so than other children need external structure in their lives. A chaotic home life without consistency or structure makes their internal chaos worse.
On the other hand, a home life with a structure, with routines they can depend on will help them improve their internal organization.
The brain demonstrates neuroplasticity, that is, it changes, actually changes its structure based on the demands you make on it. You establish routines for your ADHD child and eventually ( you know nothing comes fast with this group) he or she internalizes it.
You are teaching organization by demonstrating it.
Want to handle the problems of getting up in the morning? Have a routine for it and follow it precisely.
Problems with homework? Have a routine for it. This is the time you do your homework every day. This is where you do your homework every day. These are your materials to do your homework. They will be here every day.
Also, and very important for a variety of reasons, is a family meal time. We meet for our meal, discuss the events of the day, discuss any problems we have ( no anger or frustration from parents,please). This is a time to get to make sure we still know each other. No TV. No cell phones. No texting. No game boys.
Routines provide structure. They also provide comfort for children. Structure makes the world more predictable. Having a strong family structure also makes it easier to adapt and adjust to the structures in other environments, like school.
Eventually, with consistency structures are internalized by children. They start to expect them and eventually, they start developing their own structures/ routines.
Chaos without leads to chaos within.
Organization without leads to organization within.
ADHD brains require special handling.
For more information on ADHD brains, see Training ADHD Brains-Meditation @ http://terrygingrasphd.com